After having two really rough days with Pax (and when I mean rough, I mean on the verge of tears because nothing and I mean nothing is working to make this kid happy) something amazing happened. We had a really perfect day today! So perfect that my usual Thursdays where I’m with Pax from wakeup to bedtime by myself, was actually pretty great! I relished in his every laugh and smile and soaked up the sound of him babbling like he’s telling his momma a good story. I sit here so thankful and so honoured to be his mom and I don’t think I could trade any of those really horrible days for all the perfect ones. Because on days like today, when I’m getting choked up that Paxton is here and he’s mine and feeling so proud to be his mom, I know deep in my heart that even on the worst of days he needs me and I need him and that’s what gets us to the good days.

Nick gives Paxton his last bottle before we go to sleep and as tradition he brings him over to me for one last kiss before he goes back into his crib. Still half asleep, I lean in and give him the biggest kiss and little squeeze and then motion to Nick to hurry up and put him back to sleep before he wakes up. I love this dance we do every night. Bottle, burp, kiss and back to sleep.

My advice… don’t give up on the bad, tough and plain horrible days, because they lead to the most perfect, loveable, extra kisses goodnight kind of days.